Blakely, classmate of two years, moves to Pennsylvania
As a child growing up as part of a military family, I left my school and friends behind every three years or so, setting up shop each time in some new state or country to make an entirely new set of friends. It rarely bothered me much (though the move after fourth grade was incredibly difficult for me), and I learned quickly that homes were temporary and new friends plentiful. I sometimes wonder if that’s shaped my approach to friendships over the years—for better and for worse—to make me more adaptive, in some ways, to loss.
I can remember the people I’ve left behind over the years: the kid with the thick glasses in kindergarten in Rome, NY; Gina, the girl next door when I was in first grade there; Bunty, Teddy, Mike, and Greg from Newark, OH; Wellington Chang(!) and Yusuke from Fairfax, VA; the various Mikes and Jerries from Oklahoma (and a girl whose name I have forgotten who confessed her love for me the day I left, to my dismay); a number of folks from my high school (many of whom were transient themselves); and my many friends (and groups of friends) from college. Their faces are clear to me, even if my youngest friendships feel more abstract than my teenaged ones.
If I were to write a Moving Book, the person moving would be me, over and over again. I’d list the schools and parks and teams and teachers I left behind as I went. I never thought to write it all down; it’s just in my head, my field of view changing gradually, with a few kids holding space in the shadows each time.
prodigal father returns on his eponymous day from epic public speaking thingy, bearing edible and non-edible tributes for esteemed publisher and her mother
It is true, I am back from London and stopped at “Harroods”.
Another catchup edition?!?! Indeed, because I have been in London speaking at a conference and being weirdly jetlagged. In any case, Mommy did a great job as interim editor and paid a lot of attention to Kina’s hair in the masthead.
Lisa Visits to Read Letters to Kina in Utero From CA & NY Baby Showers in 2016 for HS Graduation Speech Inspo for Her
“When you are 10… When you are 16…”
At Laurea’s baby shower, we invited our guests to fill out these letters to Kina for when she was 10, 18, and 30. We hadn’t pulled them out for seven and a half years, until our friend Lisa suddenly needed to give a graduation speech at the high school she teaches in. No spoilers, but the letters were great.
As Bart Simpson once said, I’m a little behind on my rounds. It’s been an eventful weekend, what can I say?
“Daddy, What If Your Name Was ‘Déja Boo’?”
Kina gives Daddy new superhero hane; it’s actually not bad…
I was going to say “drag name”, but that felt a little too appropriative. She has on multiple occasions this weekend called me “Déja Boo Yee”, which really rings nicely.
Proud parents listen as Kina describes elaborate plan to protect picked-on student; Mommy delicately explains inner lives of bullies
Everybody’s staying anonymous here, but I am proud of Kina and her tough girl classmates for standing up for a boy in her class who got the short end of the bully stick. As angry as it makes me to hear about these things, I have to remind myself that these kids are seven and eight years old, and that their behaviors are just an extension of their own experiences—much like the behaviors and neuroses of their adults. It’s hard to explain that all to Kina, but it’s a lot easier when you know she’s confident enough to protect the people who need protecting. She can spend the rest of her life becoming familiar with the virality of trauma, but she’s kind today.
Now that the students have learned everything they are capable of, it is time to cut loose and hit the waterfront
“Mr. Ortiz says we’ve learned all the units,” said Kina recently, “and that the rest of the school year is just for fun!” This, completely failing to acknowledge that the entirety of the 2023-24 school year has been fun for Kina and her classmates—and not lacking for educational rigor, though I think I have never known a class to embark on quite as many field trips as this one did, and will, for the remainder of this very long and very fun school year.
Child unimpressed with parents’ boring staycation gift, even though Daddy risked shame and imprisonment in picking it
Whenever Laurea and I have a little getaway for the two of us, we are supposed to bring Kina back little gifts. Clothes, toys, candy, whatever. This time, we snuck into the walled garden of our hotel and snipped off one of the hundreds of blooming peonies, which we thought Kina would appreciate, given her propensity for stealing flowers.
Reader, she did not appreciate it. Flowers are too boring.
Child forced to explain once again to babysitting grandparents that she can definitely pick her clothes
It’s hard to understand sometimes that seven is “big”, but it is good from time to time to be reminded—especially when parents are out of town and the grandparents kick in.
for reasons not yet fully understood, child allows one (1) kiss at apartment door before school drop off
Kina has not allowed us to smooch in her presence for several months, and we are suspicious of her motives for allowing it now, but we are taking advantage of the opportunity and are grateful to our leader.
It feels weird that the contemporary meaning of “politics” is what it is, when the original meaning is about the ways in which we make collective decisions and share power. Politicians today feel, in the abstract, so isolated and self-serving that it is easy to forget the many civil servants who are in fact out here trying to push and pull their way through the hard task of serving a community, a city, a nation, a world.
How do you provide for the sustenance and happiness of the people who live on your block and look like you without sacrificing the lives of the people who live in a faraway neighborhood? What does it mean to consider not just your own community but the ways in with your community is inextricably linked with those around you—even those that are seemingly very different from you?
I explained politicians to Kina in this way, possibly hoping that by naming it, I could make it so.
kid points out that hide and seek worth only one day of being liked, and wouldn’t it be nice to be liked for two?
Reader, I decided I would be liked for two days, and I ended up having both to find Kina in one of her many nooks, and also to pretend to use Kina as ingredients for “chili lasagna”. It all took about half an hour, and I would like to point out that she already didn’t like me by this afternoon, when I told her I wouldn’t listen to one particular twee decade-old ballad in the car multiple times.
This has been hopefully the best news you hear about children today. I really hope the other news about children gets better.
She seems confident in the profit margins in lemonade stands in 2024
Kina sometimes wonders why we do not own a house, which is reasonable when you understand that she only a passing familiarity with money, real estate, and the notion of a million dollars. So, when passing a cute little pink house in Greenpoint the other day and asking what it might cost for us to move into it, she didn’t understand that 2.7 million dollars worth of real estate is not easily acquired by the average New Yorker on a whim.
Later that day, as we were walking through Brooklyn Bridge Park, she mused out loud that she would get rich just to buy us that house to live in together, and that she reckoned that, on a hot day, you could sell quite a lot of lemonade and slime. Far be it from me to disabuse her of the notion, as long as I can sit in the fabulous sun room out back.
The house entered contract later that evening. Maybe next time, Kina.
student athlete rises early for best day of entire school year
Astute readers will recall that there was no field day last year, due to wildfires, so it’s no wonder that Kina rose early to have a special field day just for her class. Kudos to Mr Ortiz for going above and beyond. Yet again.
Over the last four years of writing this newspaper, I have enjoyed every little opportunity I can get to use copywriting tricks like [square brackets] that clarify quotes. It just scratches that itch I always had from when I dreamt of being a real journalist, without all the drama and excessive smoking.
Kina is selected to stand on stage with visiting Chinese dance troupe, presumably (she says) because she is Asian.
I came home from work yesterday to find Kina engaged in an elaborate Kung Fu exhibition in our living room, having spent all of five minutes on stage with a local Kung Fu school. I’m not an expert in the form, but I would say that Kina has made considerable progress, given the extent of her training so far.
“They put me right in the middle,” she said proudly, “because I am Asian.”
Happy Asian American and Pacific Islander Heritage Month from the girl you least want to sneak up on.
“One, face paint; two, paint nails; three, bouncy castle w/friends”
Kina knows that face painting is always the longest line, and so she shows up early. The bouncy castle, however, is forever. And ever. And ever.
Yesterday’s schoolyard festival was, as you might imagine, a fundraiser for Kina’s school budget—gutted, as I am obligated to remind you, by our city’s current administration. I thought of you all as I forked over cash for face painting and bouncy castles. This is all worth it.
If you have been thinking, “oh hey let me fix public education by reading The Daily Kina,” you still have a fighting chance at funding this month’s donation drive (currently at $15, which can buy around two reams of copier paper) by upgrading to a “premium subscription” at this button I just learned that you could put in an email:
Sits on Daddy’s lap while he holds a sweater over her head; young ballerina transfixed by groups dancing bachata, modern, Memphis Jookin’, and tap.
I wrote about the NYC Dance Parade two years ago, when it was not raining. Last year, it rained, and we did not go. This year, it rained again, and we went. This year was the best year.
I guess it seemed like a promising opportunity, with Mommy and Daddy out for a date and a movie on the TV, but Kina is ultimately our daughter, and this family sleeps.
Argues with Daddy, art collector, about the term “glaze”
She insists that the shiny coating on her ceramic cat is called “a white glue that turns clear”, and she insists so vehemently that I am questioning if this is even actually clay or some weird new, 21st-Century clay-adjacent material that got invented sometime in the four decades after that time I made my grandmother a Star Wars-themed landspeeder ashtray.
Given how upset Kina gets when we interrupt her long story setups, I am honestly glad to honor this request when she makes it. It’s a good reminder that stories don’t always end the way we expect.
dad
p.s. The Daily Kina’s public school rescue drive is afoot, with $10 raised so far! Can we get to $20 by this weekend?? Mash the “Sign up for a premium subscription” link in the footer today!
Kid and the other Maple girls build multi-layer, ranked-choice bus seating system for class field trip
Kina loves roasting the boys, who seem totally uninterested in which boys sit with each other on the field trip buses. Meanwhile, Kina has a five-level fallback for her bus partner and is excited to see the sea lions.
In other news, Kina’s school is doing a fundraiser, and while I haven’t taken a direct approach with you readers for helping to raise said funds, it is worth noting that the current mayor of New York City has made substantial cuts to public education in a system that supports over a million children. This has led to shortfalls at every school, and while I have very specific thoughts about mayoral control of the New York City Public Schools, the immediate impact is that parents are filling the gap.
How can you help? Glad you asked. I’ve decided that every paid subscription we get this month will go to Kina’s school as part of their Spring fundraiser. If you have not already (and please, Kina’s Lala, do not increase your monthly rate), you can head on down to the bottom of this here email and hit “Sign up for a premium subscription” and donate whatever you wish—even a dollar is fine. All subscriptions this month will go directly to Kina’s school and earmarked from “Readers of the Daily Kina”.
Child discovers one of the central struggles of identity
It must be odd, the first time you realize that you’ve never actually looked at your own real face, and that most of the time, the face you see is backwards from your actual face. I also still think about it all the time, and I’m 42 years older than Kina.
Sometimes I think this newspaper is just a safe way to talk about how being a kid is basically like being wildly stoned.
bedtime child lukewarm on Daddy’s heartwarming tale of Puppy going on a hilarious bender in San Francisco
I dunno, I just thought it would be funny to imagine her stuffed puppy out carousing in San Francisco circa 2018, after that one time we lost him on the playground in the Mission and I had to get another one express-delivered to our AirBnB, and Kina asked why he was so… clean.
They exchange notes on “clock time” and “event time” in an attempt to convince her to brush her teeth
As the most clock-oriented person in our household, Laurea often has a difficult time relating to the meandering flow of her roommates’ morning routines. Kina responds with frustration when Laurea tells her she can play for five more minutes before brushing her teeth, no matter how kindly her mother delivers the ultimatum. This often prompts Kina to simply start her dawdling anew, in an effort to reach whatever state of calm she was seeking in the first place—which just brings Laurea back to the timer, which restarts the whole process.
The other day, Laurea brought to me the notion of “clock time versus event time”, which seemed like a revelation to both of us in some ways but is actually a fairly well-documented differentiator of social structures.
In short, Laurea is on clock time—driven by schedules that are locked to a globally-agreed-upon and highly specific thing we invented and that Kina and I have never fully understood.
child deploys favorite new phrase of deep disappointment
What makes it extra funny is that she mutters “aw shoot” just milliseconds after she is disappointed, which suggests that she uses “aw shoot” when she already knows it’s gone south.
End of Spring Break means she gets to see Mr Ortiz
It has become something of a tradition for us to forget to plan an actual vacation during Spring Break, and this year was no exception. It is also typically the case, though, that Kina’s break is eventful and pleasant—and again, this year was no exception. She saw her little cousin Otis, her Lala, her Yeh-yeh and Grandma; she visited her Daddy’s real newspaper job; she gave me a high five at my first half marathon; she saw the Cloisters with Hannah; and she picked a bunch of tulips she ought not to have.
And despite all that action, she was thrilled to go back to school yesterday, if only to see her favorite teacher in the world, Ricky Ortiz, who celebrated his birthday just as his entire second grade class returned from the rest of the world (or, in Kina’s case, various local playgrounds). She had prepared for him an elaborate card with chocolates and modeling clay taped to it—things she said he would love, and when we dropped her off at the school gate, she bolted towards the gym as fast as she could, so that she could be the very first kid in line.
Kina is lucky to love school; not every kid gets it. I’m glad we have been able to instill a love for community and learning in her, but I have to give credit where it’s due. The teachers she’s had have been astonishing, inspiring, and loving; Mr. Ortiz stands tall among the giants, and Kina adores him. Thanks and Happy Birthday to Our Publisher’s favorite second-grade teacher. She could not stop talking about you.
